7 Questions I Have About Tinder

Hi lovelies ♥

Do you guys use Tinder? I have a bit of a love-hate-relationship with it, much like with online shopping. On the one hand, they rarely ever run out of stock. On the other hand, free returns are a lot more awkward.

But in the end, it’s a fast way to meet lots of people, and being the sucker for efficiency that I am, I’ve gotten used to it. Well, almost. There are a few things that still confuse me.

Can you swipe your way to Prince Charming? 

1. Do some parents just hate their children and give them the worst name they can think of on purpose? Names need vowels. Someone should do a public service announcement to inform people of that.

2. Whatever happened to razors and why doesn’t anyone shave anymore? I realize some girls like beards. That’s fine. To each their own. But why has EVERYONE stopped shaving? Is my wedding picture just going to be me, a pair of eyes and a hipster beard?

3. Why do people use profile pictures of themselves rock-climbing, or mountain biking? Those are so intimidating I always swipe left. Because what if he expects me to join in?? Then I might have to move. And I’m really not into that. Except maybe during running. Or when I’m on top.

4.  Is it acceptable to swipe right and then text “You’re really not my type, but the cat/dog/baby in your picture is adorable. Can I hang out with them?” ?

5. Why has every man between the ages of 25 and 32 at some point in his life given a speech in a suit? Is that some secret rite of passage I don’t know about? Why have I never given a speech in a suit?

6. What do people hope to achieve when they add offensive quotes to their profiles? Like the other day I read “If you don’t look like your profile picture, you’re paying for the drinks until you do.” I can only assume that guy is really thirsty by now.

7. Why do men on Tinder have profile pictures showing themselves and a pretty girl? Like, hello? Why are you here? Go hang out with the girl in your picture and leave Tinder to us socially awkward / overly busy / completely desperate people!

Despite its quirks, though, Tinder can be a fun place. A few weeks back I found a guy whose profile description said “Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana.”

I bet he gets laid like crazy.

Love,

Damita